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A Safe Bet 2 A Better Ending
As you can tell when I wrote the second part it had many mistakes and an unsatisfying ending. I rushed it. Like wrote it in one day rush. I wanted to get the second part posted and should have stopped and taken my time to do it right. I think the biggest issue I think faster then I can type. Hopefully this will make up for it.
Brian
I realized I just walked out of the party and left the car there. Thankfully we didn’t live far away. We, I guess that will be changing soon. We. For 2 letters is such a big word. Are we still going to be a we or will I become just an I….words…ugh. I don’t even know what I’m thinking about anymore. I do know one thing I am thinking about. Why did Brittany marry me? The answer isn’t really that hard, because she needed someone to take care of her and the kids. I knew her situation of being a single mom. She was the first one I ever dated. I don’t know about other guys but when you start dating marriage is down the list after getting laid and getting laid again. You don’t realize your even thinking about marriage until you’re in to deep. The kids had me wrapped around their little fingers. God Damn It!! Those kids, did she put them up to getting me to marry her? Do they really love me. No, that’s stupid. They are to young to fake love. The old saying if you want the truth ask a drunk or a child. A child will love you only because they want too.
Where the hell is my house? I stopped and looked around to realize I’ve walk way past my house. My house, how long will it be my house? I don’t know if it will be for long. With all the thinking I’ve been doing I’ve never once thought of leaving or even divorce. My anger at finding out she didn’t really love me overtook every thought for the last..jeez, how long have I been walking? I’m all over the place. I have to get myself together. First I have to get home.
Brittany
I guess news travels fast because now I’m getting strange looks from people and no one is talking to me. I’m trying to make my exit without looking like a fool but its not working. I’m at the door and Debra grabs me and ask whats going on. I don’t have time for the third degree I’m about to get so I quickly tell her I have to find Brian there’s been a misunderstanding and I’ll explain later as I grab the door handle. Times like these makes you wonder if people really care about you or they are just being newsy.
I’m surprised to see the car still parked outside. I’m taking that as Brian still caring enough to leave it for me so I can get home safely. Thankfully the kids are at Brian’s parents house. They spoil those 2 like they are blood. Oh God, how will this effect that relationship. I’m jumping ahead of myself. I know I can fix this. I know Brian will see how much I love him. It was only a very bad joke.
The house is still dark when I pull up and my car is still in the driveway. I don’t know what that means. Is he in there sleep? Did he go someone else to stay? Is he ever coming home? What if he never comes home? What if he wants a divorce? What if he hurt himself? My mind is racing a mile a minute. I need to get myself under control if I’m going to save my marriage. Save my marriage, that’s the first time I thought that I would be trying to save my marriage. How much damage have I done to it? Its not like I cheated on him. I’ve never been with another man since we met. Not knowing what he is thinking now is killing me. What Mark said at the party opened my eyes to how men think at least a little. Would Brian think because I didn’t love him at first I would or have cheated? Did he think I was laughing at him?
The door is locked which doesn’t mean anything. Brian always locks the door because he says it keeps his family safe. Its the little things like that that made me fall in love with him.
I look into the bedroom and he’s not there and no clothes that I can see are missing. I wonder were he can be when I hear the front door open. I run down the hall what I see stops me in my tracks.
Brian
I see the car in the driveway and the living room lights on. At first I’m glad she made it home safely then I realize I’ll have to talk to her. Of course the door is unlocked. An ongoing argument between us. With the way the world is nowadays I always lock the door no matter what. She never does saying “I have a big strong man to defend her and the kids”. Is this another joke on the dumb blind guy I have become to know myself to be?
She comes running down the hall from the bedroom. She stops when she sees me. I guess my look isn’t as inviting as she hoped. Hell, I don’t know what she hoped for after what she said. I know I’m tired and sweaty. It wasn’t along walk but the summer night air and getting lost didn’t help.
My first words to her was “why?”
First Confrontation
“Why?” Brittany responds, “what do you mean”
“What do I mean, you can’t be serious, why did you marry me? Why did you make me waste almost 7 years of my life? Why didn’t you love me?” It all came rushing out like they opened an overfull damn. I don’t think I ever yelled at her. I had no reason to until now that is.
“I do love you. You know I do” She said almost pleading.
“You didn’t when you married me did you? What, you just saw some sucker that could take care of you and the kids? Some shumck? A Safe Bet? Where you waiting for someone better to come along. This whole marriage has been one big bad lie! Damn it Brittany I loved you and those kids and this whole time, every single day was one lie after another!”
I was losing it. I must have looked like a mad man. I was a a mad man. I was pacing around the living room, arms waving, spittle flying. I looked at Brittany and she was scared. Maybe not scared of what I would do physically but scared of what the future held. Was she scared of losing her meal ticket?
“I can’t deal with this right now. I’m going to bed. I’ll sleep in JJ’s room tonight. Maybe we can talk tomorrow when I have a clearer head and decide what to do” and just walked away.
I didn’t even get to say anything. I’ve never seen Brian so mad before. He’s never yelled at me before. How could one stupid joke change someone so quickly. And what was there to decide about? He can’t be thinking divorce. He knows I love him. For the first time I’m worried about what the future holds and how I can say my marriage.
Next Day Clearer Heads, maybe
Morning came earlier than I thought it would. I guess I was more tired then I thought. Sleeping in JJ’s bed felt like summer camp with my feet sticking out the end of the bed. I figured with everything I was going through sleep would not come. It did with a vengeance,
It was still early so I couldn’t call my parents about the kids. Jeez, what should I tell them. They will be heartbroken. They loved the kids as much as I do. Would they be able to see them if we divorced. Would I? Would I have to pay child support? So many questions and so few answers. Should I talk to a lawyer? Well, the only answers I can get would have to come from Brittany.
I went into the master bedroom to use the bathroom simply from habit. I realized I could have used the kids bathroom. That thought came to late when I entered the bedroom and found Brittany sleep on the bed still dressed. It looked like she had been crying. I wondered what she was crying about? Loss of love or support.
She was stirring as I came out the bathroom “its to early to call my folks. I’m going to ask if they can keep them for the rest of the weekend”
“That’s a good idea, we have a lot to talk about” she said pensively. She knew it was going to be a tough slog to convince Brian of her love. Maybe not at the beginning but definitely now. “Do you want me to cook breakfast?”
“I don’t know if I can eat right now. Maybe after I take a shower and get myself together. I’ll go into the kids bathroom to shower” He grabbed some clothes and left the room.
Brittany sat on the bed trying not to cry. She hoped she was cried out after last night. She had a mission to accomplish. Shaking head she got up to get ready to face the hardest day she would ever have.
She found Brian in the kitchen with a cup of coffee. She knew he made enough for her because it was in his DNA. Another thing she loved about him. She didn’t think there was enough paper on earth to list all of his good points.
Brian looked at his wife, at least for now. He just didn’t know. How could she explain herself to sooth the hurt she caused? What reason could she give to explain the last 6 years of marriage?
Brittany surprised Brian by taking the proverbial bull by the horns. “Have you been happy the last 6 years we’ve been married?”
Brian was momentarily caught off guard with that question. He didn’t know what to expect, more pleading, some excuses. Shaking his head to clear it he respond, “I was until last night when I found out it was all a lie” He didn’t want the anger to return but it was creeping in.
“There was no lie Brian, not the marriage. We are husband and wife in the eyes of God and man. That’s no lie. How we got there may have been, at first, and for that I’m sorry. But on the life of JJ and Julie I’m not sorry for marrying you”
“Of course you are happy. You got a nice house, father for your kids and a sucker to pay for it!” Yeah, the anger had returned.
“You were never a sucker. Yes I was looking for all of that. What woman isn’t looking for a man who can provide for her and be a good father to her kids whether she has them going into the relationship or will have them. What I said at the party was partly true.” Brian’s head shot up but Brittany had a hand up to stop any response he had. “You are or rather hadn’t been the type of man I would have dated before I had the kids. You know what their father looks like, bearded, rough around the edges, almost a biker type. I’ve always dated those types of guys. And look where it got me. 2 kids, abandoned by the father and barely making ends meet. I had changed over time. I knew I needed to be better and that meant making better choices. And one of those was the type of man I would have in my life. I had talked to Sissy at work, she knew I was looking for a good man, and she said she had the perfect guy. She even had the party as a cover just for us to meet.” Brian, you were and are that good man I was looking for.
“So Sissy and who else was in on getting the sucker married”? Did Jessie know, Mark or his wife. A little club to hook the sucker.
“Jessie didn’t know anything about it and no one else did either. It was between Sissy and me. And stop calling your self a sucker Brian. I thought you were cute before we were introduced. Sissy had pointed you out. It took me longer to get to you because some guy was trying to pick me up and it took me a minute to get away without causing a scene. So I had options that night and guess what, you were option number 1 and there wasn’t a number 2. After everything Sissy had said about you I wanted to find out for myself. And everyday I thank God that I did”
“But you didn’t love me when we married, did you? You knew I was steady and the kids liked me so what harm was getting married to a Safe Bet’.
“I can’t say I didn’t love but also can’t say I did love you. Looking back I still had some of the old Brittany still in me. You are everything a woman wants in a husband. All the things that you think makes you a sucker makes you a great husband. I worked on this marriage as much as you have. I’ve never looked at another man since that party. My biggest fear was the kids not liking you. That went out the window the first day they met you. And do you think I would let my children around just anyone. I can’t wait for you to walk Julie down the aisle at her wedding. That’s what a father does. You have become their father. I don’t want to lose that. I don’t want to lose us! Not because your a sucker, because I love you with all my heart. And if you are a sucker you are my sucker for the rest of my life. Look inside yourself and ask if the last 6 years haven’t been the best of your life. You know we are good together.”
Brian was trying to come up with some type of rebuttal. Everything Brittany said was true in some way or other. We all have things we look for in a life partner. He had realized how much harder it was for a single mother. Was his anger because of what she said, what she did or that she embarrassed him.
“Britt, I do love you, I’m not going to deny that. But you embarrassed and hurt me to no end last night. You say it was a joke. You need to keep your day job because comedy is not your thing. I need some time to wrap my head around all of this. I need some time to think. The kids can stay at Mom’s for now. I’m going out for a while.
Reflection
Brian
It was still to early to call a friend so I went to Waffle House. I mean where else to be miserable then there. Nothing like making life changing decisions over some waffles, eggs and hash browns. Even this early in the morning it was getting busy. I found a little booth and ordered. I ran through all the things Brittany had said. Her points and counterpoints. But it was becoming a circular argument in my head. I needed a third party to help me sort everything out. I know who to call but I still had a couple of hours before I could without waking everyone up.
Brittany
At least he’s given me some hope that he will at least think things through. I made my case the best I could. I could see in his eyes that he knows I really love him. I just hope its enough.
Sissy was the first to call, and not the last, asking what the hell was going on. I spent most of the morning answering questions or deflecting. Most gave me hope of a good outcome. Others just wanted the tea. I had called Brian’s parents about keeping the kids. I fibbed a little and told them we wanted some us time this weekend.
Brian
Walking off that breakfast at the park helped. It gave me more time to think. I called Mark. He was there when this Shakespearean drama all started. He told me had talked to Britt before she left the party. We were meeting at the A1 Diner at 12. If this keeps up I’m going to get fat.
I had again grabbed a booth so we could have whatever you consider privacy in a crowded diner during lunch. I figure most people didn’t care what was going on in others peoples life. Mark walked in and after giving each other a bro hug we sat. The waitress came over as soon as he sat down.
Once we had ordered Mark asked how I was doing? “Surprisingly I’m holding up. I guess I’m through the anger phase. Now I’m trying to figure out where to go from here. You said you talked to her after I left, what did she have to say?”
“She said she was joking. I told her some things aren’t funny. Especially towards a husband and even worse in front of his friends. I think she understood the seriousness of the situation. So what happened when you got home?”
“I was so mad I couldn’t talk to her last night without yelling. I wanted answers but wasn’t in the right frame of mind to listen. I slept in JJ’s room. I didn’t want her to be able to use as a weapon. You know how women do. This morning she’s saying she loved me and wanted to be together forever. When I asked about how she didn’t love me and was using me as a safety blanket she talked about the things all women look for in a man. In hindsight her argument is valid, The main point to me is she didn’t love me when she married me. I didn’t get a clear answer on that point”
“Where is your head at? Are you willing to work it out or cut bait? You have to look at all the angles. Staying might take some work from both of you. Maybe counseling, possibly a short term separation. I hate to bring it up but divorce is not only going to cost you a future but there are 2 little factors to consider. You might not have to pay child support since I understand you haven’t officially adopted the kids but spousal support will hurt. Especially with that promotion you just got. The only two questions you need to ask yourself is, Can you live with knowing what you know and will your life be better or worse without her and the kids?”
“Jeez, Mark you were supposed to help not making my decision harder”, I said laughingly.
“I’m not going to tell you what to do or what decision to make but you know you got a good thing with Brittany and the kids. Everyone knows shes loves you. And those kids definitely love you. Some guys would kill for what you have”
“The house is strong but the foundation has some cracks in it now” Brian responded.
“Cracks can be fixed. Its easier to fix a crack than buy a new home. Hey, I just thought of something. You’re upset because you say Brittney didn’t love you when you got married, right? Have you heard of arranged marriages?
“Sure, they still do that in some European and Asian countries.”
“I don’t know where I read but it stuck with me because it seemed so outrageous. In India 90% of all marriages are arranged. Many of them they only meet before the wedding. And the divorce rate is 1% and in America, you know the good old US of A, its only 4%. I didn’t know even we had that here. They lasted because they usually had similar backgrounds. a good support system and a strong commitment to each other. Does that sound like two people we might know?’ They say its not how you start its how you finish.”
“So I’m Indian now” Looking at him sideways with a smile.
“If it keeps you happy you can be whatever you want nowadays and no one will say a thing”.
“Thanks Mark, I knew you were the right one to call. I feel better about what I need to do”
Epilogue
Why was I sweating so much. And this collar is way to tight. I knew I had the wrong shoes. Its not going to be much longer and it will be over. The door opens and I’m asked to come out. I’m the last one left in the room. Everyone else has been gone what seemed like forever but only 20 minutes. I take a slow deep breath. I’ve been waiting for this for all my life. I walk out and hear “Are you ready Daddy?”
“Babygirl, I’ve been ready from the first day I met you” Processions of the Nobles start to play and I look at my oldest daughter, Julie, and take her arm to lead her down the aisle.
ero
